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英语冷笑话简单带翻译

学习啦【英语笑话】 编辑:韦彦 发布时间:2016-09-14

  政治笑话采用一种幽默与讽刺相结合的方式,从本质上讲,它属于“政治言论的符号空间里的边缘层”。下面小编整理了英语冷笑话简单带翻译,希望大家喜欢!

  英语冷笑话简单带翻译品析

  An Adult Decision

  The year before my son turned 18, he constantly pleaded to be allowed to a tattoo, but Irefused to sign permission for one. He argued that soon he would be a man and he should beable to make adult decisions. Sure enough, a few days after his 18th birthday, he come homewith a tattoo. Although I was not happy about this, I was curious to see what symbol ofmasculinity he had chosen. There, on his shoulder, was a two-inch image of Mickey Mouse.

  成年人的抉择

  我儿子十八岁前的那一年,他常常向我提出准许他文身。但我拒绝允许他这样做。他争辩说他不久就要成为男子汉了,并说他应该能够作出成年人的抉择了。果然,十八岁生日的几天后,他文了身,回到家里。尽管我对此感到不高兴,但出于好奇,我想看看他选择了什么雄性象征物。原来是他在肩上文了一个两英寸长的米老鼠像。

  经典英语冷笑话简单带翻译

  You're Not Going to Make it

  Gravely ill, a man went to the doctor with his wife. After the examination the physician motioned for the wife to meet him in the hallway.

  "Your husband is very sick, " the doctor said, "but there are three things you can do to ensure his survival. First, fix him three healthful, delicious meals a day. Next, give him a stress-free environment , and don't complain about anything. Finally, make passionate love to him every day.

  On the drive home the husband asked, "What did the doctor say?"

  "I'm sorry, " she said, "but you're not going to make it."

  你活不成了

  一个人得了重病,妻子伴随他去看医生。检查过后,医生示意病人的妻子到走廊见他。

  “你丈夫病得很重,”医生说,“但有三件事可保住他的性命。第一,一日三餐,要营养美味。第二,给他一个轻松的环境,不要抱怨。第三,每天都对他倾注炽热的爱。”

  在驱车回家的路上,丈夫问道:“医生说了什么?”

  “很遗憾,”妻子说,“你活不成了。

  关于英语冷笑话简单带翻译

  What Will Be the Headline

  When a man in Macon, Ga. , came upon a wild dog attacking a young boy, he quickly grabbedthe animal and throttled it with his two hands. A reporter saw the incident, congratulated theman and told him the headline the following day would read, "Local Man Saves Child by KillingVicious Animal. "

  The hero, however, told the journalist that he wasn't from Macon.

  "Well, then," the reporter said, the headline will probably say, 'Georgia Man Saves Child by KillingDog. '"

  "Actually," the man said, "I'm from Connecticut."

  "In that case," the reporter said in a huff, "the headline will read ,'Yankee Kills Family Pet.'"

  标题是什么

  一位男子在乔治亚州的麦根城遇到一条狗在袭击一个男孩。他敏捷地用两手卡住了狗的脖子并掐死了它。一位记者目睹了这件事,向这位男子表示祝贺并说次日的新闻标题将是:“本地男子杀恶畜救孩童”。

  然而,这位英雄却告诉记者他不是麦根人。

  “那么,”记者说,“标题可能为‘乔治亚男子杀狗救孩童’”.

  “实际上,”那男子道,“我是康涅狄格人。”

  “这样的话,”记者怒气冲冲地说,“标题将是‘北方佬杀死家庭爱犬’”

  英语冷笑话简单带翻译欣赏

  I'm a police officer

  When my husband, Jack, was a police officer, he once approached a home guarded by two ferocious dogs. They lunged at the screen door with such force that it opened, and they tore out into the yard.

  Thinking quickly, Jack, stepped into the house, closing the door tightly behind him. " It's all right, ma'am," he reassured the homeowner " I'm a police officer."

  "Not a very brave one," 'she observed.

  我是警察

  在我丈夫杰克还是警察的时候,一次他走近有两只恶狗看守的庭院。那两只狗奋力地扑抓纱门,把门弄开了并冲到院子里。

  杰克反应迅速,三步并两步地跨入房子里,牢牢地关上身后的门。“没事了,女士,”他安慰家主道,“我是警察。”

  “可不是很勇敢的一个。”她淡淡地说。

  英语冷笑话简单带翻译品味

  A Tough Teacher

  A school teacher friend of mine injured his back and had to wear a plaster cast around theupper part of his body. On his first day of the term, still with the cast under his shirt, he wasassigned to teach the most undisciplined class. Stepping confidently into the rowdyclassroom, he opened the window as wide as possible. Just then, a strong breeze made his tieflap. Trying to fix the tie , he took a blackboard eraser and hammered a large tack through histie into his chest.

  He had no trouble with discipline that term.

  强悍的教师

  我有一位作教师的朋友弄伤了他的背,因此上身不得不穿石膏罩。开学的第一天,他的身上还穿着石膏罩。他被分派教最不守纪律的班级。他很自信地步入乱哄哄的教室,把窗子尽可能大地打开。就在这时,一阵强风把他的领带吹得飘起来。为了固定领带,他拿起黑板擦,把一个大头钉透过领带砸入他的胸膛。

  那学期在他的课上,没有不守纪律的。

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