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简单英文笑话小短文欣赏

学习啦【英语笑话】 编辑:韦彦 发布时间:2016-09-14

  明清笑话结集者带着牢骚郁结的心态,以嘻笑怒骂皆成文章为动机,使笑话承担着度世的教化职责。下面小编整理了简单英文笑话小短文,希望大家喜欢!

  简单英文笑话小短文品析

  你跑到哪儿去了?

  Once upon a time, there was a man who always forgot things. One day, he went out with hislittle son. He was so happy that he put the son ride his neck.

  After a time, he suddenly thought of his son, he asked people: "Have you seen my child?"

  One of his villagers laughed and said: "Don't you know he is on your neck?"

  Hearing this, the man took down his son from his neck, he was so angry that he hit the sonon the face, then shouted: "I have told you not to go here and there. Where did you go justnow?"

  原来有个人记性极差。一天,他带着小儿子出去玩。一高兴,便把小儿子举起来,让他骑在自己的脖子上。

  过了一会儿,他忽然想起儿子来,逢人便问:“你看到我孩子了吗?”

  “哎,你脖子上的那个不是吗?”有个邻居见了大笑。

  这个人一把将小儿子从脖子上揪下来,狠狠地打了一耳光,骂道:“混蛋,叫你别乱跑,刚才你到哪里去了?”

  经典简单英文笑话小短文

  两条比目鱼

  Simon was an inveterate fisherman, well known for exaggerating the size of "the one that gotaway". But there came a day when he actually caught two enormous flounders. He immediatelyinvited a few friends over to dine, then tried to figure out how best to serve the fish." If I useboth," he told his wife, "it will seem ostentatious."

  "Why not serve a piece of each?" she suggested.

  "No, if I cut them up, nobody will believe I caught two giant flounders." Simon racked hisbrain. Then he had an idea.

  The guests were seated at the table when their host strode in with a platter, holding thebiggest flounder they'd ever seen. Suddenly Simon stumbled and fell. Everyone cried out indismay as the fish crashed to the floor, but Simon quickly brushed himself off.

  "Dear, " he called out to his wife, "bring in the other flounder!"

  西蒙是个老练的渔夫。人们都熟知他爱吹嘘“跑掉的那条”鱼的尺寸。但有一天他确实抓了两条极大的比目鱼。他立刻邀请几个朋友过来吃饭,然后着力搞清楚怎样将鱼端上餐桌。“如果同时端上2条鱼,”他对妻子说,“好像有点炫耀之嫌了。”

  “何不两条鱼各上一小块呢?”他妻子建议道。

  “不行,如果把两条鱼都切碎了,就不会有人相信我抓了两条大比目鱼了。”西蒙绞尽了脑汁,终于想出了一个好办法。

  客人已在餐桌边就座完毕,这时主人大步地走进来,手里端着一个托盘,托盘上是一个他们所见过的最大的比目鱼。突然西蒙被什么东西绊了一下摔倒了。所有的人都惊慌地叫了起来,因为鱼在地板上摔得粉碎。但是西蒙迅速地摆脱了窘境。

  “亲爱的,”他对妻子喊道,“把另一条鱼端上来!”

  关于简单英文笑话小短文

  特别的旅游

  One stupid guy reads an ad about a vacation cruise that costs only $ 100.After he signs upand pays, the travel agent hits him with a bat, knocks him unconscious and throws him outthe back door into the river. Soon another guy comes in, pays his fee and gets the sametreatment

  Fifteen minutes later, as the two are floating down the river together, the first man says, "Iwonder if they're serving any food on this cruise."

  "I don' t know, the second guy replied. "They didn't last year."

  一个愚笨的人读到一则假日巡航游只须花100元的广告。在他签了字付了款后,旅游经纪人用棒猛击了他一下,把他打昏了过去,并把他从后门扔进了河里。不久又来了一个人,付了钱并得到了相同的待遇。

  十五分钟后,这两个人一起向河的下游漂去。第一个人说:“不知道他们这次巡航游是否提供食物。”

  “不知道,”第二个人说道,“去年是没有的。”

  简单英文笑话小短文欣赏

  问题出在哪里

  A Japanese company and an American company had a boat race, the Japanese won by a mile.The Americans hired analysts to figure out what went wrong. They reported that the Japanesehad one person managing and seven rowing, while the Americans had seven managing and onlyone rowing. The American company immediately restructured its team. Now they had onesenior manager, six management consultants and one rower.

  In the rematch the Japanese won by two miles. So the American company fired the rower.

  一家日本公司和一家美国公司进行了一场划船比赛。日本队赢了一英里。美国人便请来了分析家探讨问题出在哪里。他们的报告说日本队有一人掌舵七人划桨,而美国队是七人掌舵一人划桨。美国公司立刻对队伍进行了重组。这次他们有一个高级舵手、六个舵手顾问、一个划桨员。

  在第二次比赛中,日本队赢了两英里。因此,美国公司解雇了划桨员。

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