英语短笑话大全爆笑的
笑话大多揭示生活中荒谬的现象,具有讽刺性和娱乐性。几乎所有的笑话都包含两个要点:一是开头,二是笑点。下面是学习啦小编带来的爆笑的英语短笑话，欢迎阅读!
爆笑的英语短笑话篇一
律师的儿子 Lawyer's Son
The lawyer's son wanted to follow in his father's footsteps,
律师的儿子想要继承他老爸的衣钵，
so he went to law school.
因此他就去读法学院。
He graduated with honors,and then went home to join his father's firm.
他以优异成绩毕业，然后返家加入他老爸的公司，
At the end of his first day at work he rushed into his father's office,and said,
就在他上班的第一天要结柬之际，他急忙地冲进他老爸的办公室说：
"Father,father,in one day I broke the car accident case that you have been working on for tenyears!"
“老爸，老爸，我一天就破了你办了十年的车祸案件!”
His father responded:"You idiot,our company lived on the funding of that case for ten years!"
他的老爸响应说：“你这个小白痴，我们公司就是依靠那个案件的资金才生存了十年呀!”
爆笑的英语短笑话篇二
Why me lord 主啊为什么是我
A man was wandering around in a field ,
有名男子在田野里徘徊
thinking about how good his wife had been to him and how fortunate he was to have her,
心里想着他的老婆对他有多么好，他多么幸运拥有她。
He asked God,"Why did you make her so kind hearted?"
他问上帝：“你为什么要把她造得这么心地善良?”
The Lord responded,"So you could love her ,my son."
主响应说：“我儿 呀，这样你就会爱她呀。”
"Why did you make her so good looking?"
“你为什么要把她造得这么貌美呢?”
"So you could love her,my son ."
“我儿呀，这样你就会爱她呀。”
"Why did you make her such a good cook?"
“你为什么要把她造成一个很会做饭菜的人呢?”
"So you could love her,my son."
“我儿呀，这样你就会爱她呀。”
The man thought about this.
这名男子想了一下这件事。
Then he said ," I don't mean to seem ungrateful or anything,but,why did you make her sostupid? "
然后他说:“我并不是有意好像我不知好歹，或是什么的,可是，你为什么把她造得这么笨?”
"So she could love you,my son."
“ 我儿呀，这样她就会爱你呀。”
爆笑的英语短笑话篇三
骗子 Liar,Liar
A wife went to the police station with her next-door neighbor to report that her husband wasmissing.
老婆与隔壁邻居到警察局报案 说她的老公失踪了。
The policeman asked her for a description.
警察要求，她形容一下。
She said,"He is 35 years old,6 feet 4 inches,has dark eyes,dark wavy hair,an athleticbuild,weighs 185 pounds,is soft-spoken ,and is good to the children."
她说：“他三十五岁，六尺四寸，黑眼睛，波浪状的深色头发;体格健壮，体重185磅，说话很轻，而且对小孩子很好。”
The next-door neighbor protested,
隔壁邻居期提出反驳说：
"Your husband is 5 feet 4 inches,chubby,bald,has a big mouth,and is mean to your children."
“你老公五尺四寸，胖嘟嘟 的，秃头，有一个太嘴巴，而且对你的小孩很刻薄。”
The wife replied,"Yes,but who wants"THIS KIND OF STUFF"back?"
老婆回答说：“你说对了，可是谁会要 这种没用的废物 回来呀?”
爆笑的英语短笑话篇四
Dying in peace 安然死亡
Helen was on her deathbed ,
海伦躺在她临终的病床上奄奄一息。
with her husband Jack at her side.
她的丈夫陪在她的身旁。
He held her cold hand and tears silently streamed down his face.
他握着她冰冷的手，泪水静静地从他的脸上流下来。
Her pale lip moved. "Jack," she said,"
她苍白的嘴唇颤动着。她说：“杰克，”
Hush," he quickly interrupted, "Don't talk."
他很快就打断说：“嘘，不要说话。”
But she insisted,"Jack,"she said in her tired voice.
但是她坚持要说。她以疲惫的声音说：
"I have to talk.I must confess.”
“杰克，我一定要说。我必须向你坦白。”
"There is nothing to confess,"said the weeping Jack.
满脸泪水的杰克说：“没什么好坦白的。
"It's all right.Everything's all right."
没关系。一切都没事。”
"No,No!I must die in peace.I must confess,Jake ,that I have been unfaithful to you."
“不，不，我必须死得安心。我一定要坦白我对你不忠;红杏出墙。”
Jack stroked her hand .
杰克抚摸着她的手。
"Now ,Helen,don't be concerned.I know all about it," he sobbed.
他啜泣着说：“海伦 ，现在你不要担心了。我全部都知道了。
"Why else would I poison you ?"
不然我为什幺要毒死你呀?"
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