学习啦【英语笑话】 编辑：韦彦 发布时间：2016-09-29
Free advice? 免费的建议?
A doctor and a lawyer were talking at a party. Their conversation was constantly interrupted by people describing their ailments and asking the doctor for free medical advice. After an hour of this, the exasperated doctor asked the lawyer, "What do you do to stop people from asking you for legal advice when you're out of the office?"
"I give it to them," replied the lawyer, "and then I send them a bill." The doctor was shocked, but agreed to give it a try.
The next day, still feeling slightly guilty, the doctor prepared the bills.
When he went to place them in his mailbox, he found a bill from the lawyer.
Reached Shore Fast快速靠岸
A guy I know was towing his boat home from a fishing trip to Lake Huron when his car broke down.
He didn't have his cell phone with him, but he thought maybe he might be able to raise someone on his marine radio to call for roadside assistance.
He climbed into his boat, clicked on the radio and said, "Mayday, mayday."
A Coast Guard officer came on and said, "State your location." "I-75, two miles south of Standish."
After a very long pause, the officer asked, "How fast were you going when you reached shore?"
Very stupid robbers 两个笨贼
Two robbers were robbing a hotel. The first robber said, "I hear sirens. Jump!"
The second one said, "But we're on the 13 th floor!"
The first one screamed back, "This is no time to be superstitious!"
I couldn't decide whether to go to Salt Lake City or Denver for vacation, so I called the airlines to get prices.
"Airfare to Denver is $300," the cheery salesperson replied. "And what about Salt Lake City?"
"We have a really great rate to Salt Lake -- $99," she said. "But there is a stopover." "Where?" "In Denver," she said.
The Mean Man's Party 吝啬鬼餐会
The notorious cheap skate finally decided to have a party. Explaining to a friend how to find his apartment, he said, "Come up to the fifth floor and ring the doorbell with your elbow. When the door open, push with your foot."
"Why use my elbow and foot?"
"Well, gosh," was the reply, "You're not coming empty-handed, are you?"