学习啦【英语笑话】 编辑：韦彦 发布时间：2016-09-30
One Sunday morning a minister apologized to his congregation for the bandage on his face. "I was thinking about my sermon while shaving,”he explained，" and cut my face.”
Afterward，in the collection plate，he found a note:"Next time，why not think about your face and cut the sermon. "
My father's health was greatly impaired after a serious operation,but his sense of humor vwas intact.
"Teddy,"the doctor told him，"you know you won't be able to work the way you've been used to."
" Well，doctor,"said my father，"if I won't be able to work the way I've been used to，you won't be able to charge me the way you've been used to !"
I was asked in by the company commander to explain why a report was in error:. "Sir;"I said，"you have to understand that I have four-idiots working for me."
He looked up from his desk-and said，"You are lucky. I have five idiots working for me.”
Knowing my husband's habit of sampling everything I bake，I left a note on a dozen mince tarts reading:"Counted—one dozen."When I returned，two tarts had disappeared, and the note had been altered to read:"Think metric.”
When my great-grandfather became a centenarian，a newspaper reporter asked him how he felt. "Fine，"Grandpa replied. "In fact，I get around better now than I did a hundred years ago.”