学习啦【英语笑话】 韦彦时间：2016-09-30 20:00:44我要投稿
As a young lawyer working on my first big case，I was sitting in federal district court watching a prominent attorney question a witness. The attorney was trying，unsuc-cessfully, to elicit certain information. Finally the judge turned to the witness and asked a question that prompted the appropriate response.
"Thank you，Your Honor，"the attorney said. "How is it that you were able.to get the crux of the matter with one question after I had tried three times?"
"Easy,"replied the judge. "I'm not paid by the hour.”
We own a small foreign car，the hinges of which are exposed to the weather and sometimes squeak. One day I was oiling the hinges when our landlord walked by.”What are you trying to do?"he asked. "Take the foreign accent out of it?"
Conversation between mother and child:
"Can I have a chocolate-chip cookie?"
"How do you ask?"
"May I have a chocolate-chip cookie?"
"What do you say?"
"May I please have a chocolate-chip cookie?"
"No. It's too close to supper."
The local weatherman was wrong in his forecasts so often that he was embarrassed and applied for a transfer，stating as his reason:"The climate here doesn't agree with me."
Early one morning, my next-door neighbor set to work with a power hedge-trimmer. He was half through the job when a neighbor appeared，still in his pajamas. He was carrying his own power clipper and offered his help, which was gratefully accepted. When the job was done, my neighbor thanked his benefactor，commenting that it had been "a real neighborly act".
"Don't mention it，“replied the other man. "I figured,by helping you，it would only take half as long and I could get back to sleep!"