好笑的英文英语笑话大全
笑话,是供人们消遣或交际的一种创造性的语言形式,其主要功能是调侃、娱乐或讽刺。小编精心收集了好笑的英文英语笑话，供大家欣赏学习!
好笑的英文英语笑话篇1
Free advice? 免费的建议?
A doctor and a lawyer were talking at a party. Their conversation was constantly interrupted by people describing their ailments and asking the doctor for free medical advice. After an hour of this, the exasperated doctor asked the lawyer, "What do you do to stop people from asking you for legal advice when you're out of the office?"
"I give it to them," replied the lawyer, "and then I send them a bill." The doctor was shocked, but agreed to give it a try. The next day, still feeling slightly guilty, the doctor prepared the bills. When he went to place them in his mailbox, he found a bill from the lawyer.
医生和律师正在一个宴会上交谈。他们的谈话常被一些人打断，那些人向医生描述自己的病症，期望获得免费的治疗建议。如此这般一个钟头后，医生有点恼火，于是他问律师：“如果不在办公时间，你是怎么阻止人们向你咨询法律问题的?”
“我会给他们建议，”律师回答，“然后我会给他们寄去帐单”。医生很震惊，但他还是决定这么试一试。第二天，带着点犯罪感，他准备了帐单。当他准备将它们放到邮箱里时，发现了一张来自律师的帐单。
好笑的英文英语笑话篇2
Reached Shore Fast 快速靠岸
A guy I know was towing his boat home from a fishing trip to Lake Huron when his car broke down. He didn't have his cell phone with him, but he thought maybe he might be able to raise someone on his marine radio to call for roadside assistance. He climbed into his boat, clicked on the radio and said, "Mayday, mayday." A Coast Guard officer came on and said, "State your location." "I-75, two miles south of Standish." After a very long pause, the officer asked, "How fast were you going when you reached shore?"
在休伦湖钓完鱼后，我的一个朋友开车拖着他的船回家。路上车坏了。 他没带手机，不过，他想，也许他可以通过海事无线广播来请求公路援助。 于是，他爬到他的船里面，启动了无线装置，喊道，“求救，求救”。一名海岸护卫队警官作出了回应，“报告你的位置”。“I-75号公路，Standish 的南面两英里”。沉默了好一会之后，警官问我的朋友，“你的船靠岸时开得有多快?”
好笑的英文英语笑话篇3
Very stupid robbers 两个笨贼
Two robbers were robbing a hotel. The first robber said, "I hear sirens. Jump!"
The second one said, "But we're on the 13 th floor!"
The first one screamed back, "This is no time to be superstitious!"
两个盗贼在一家旅馆偷东西。第一个说：“我听到警报响了，快跳吧!”
第二个说：“但是我们现在在第13层啊!”第一个尖叫着回敬他：“都什么时候了，还这么迷信!”
好笑的英文英语笑话篇4
Stopover 中途停留的优惠
I couldn't decide whether to go to Salt Lake City or Denver for vacation, so I called the airlines to get prices. "Airfare to Denver is 0," the cheery salesperson replied. "And what about Salt Lake City?" "We have a really great rate to Salt Lake -- ," she said. "But there is a stopover." "Where?" "In Denver," she said.
我想去渡假，但拿不定主意到底是去盐湖城还是去丹佛，于是我打电话到航空公司问问机票价格。“去丹佛的机票是300美元”，热情的销售人员回答。“那，去盐湖城的呢?” “去盐湖城我们有特别的优惠，只要99美元”，她回答。“但中途要停一站。”“哪?”“在丹佛”。
好笑的英文英语笑话篇5
The Mean Man's Party 吝啬鬼餐会
The notorious cheap skate finally decided to have a party. Explaining to a friend how to find his apartment, he said, "Come up to the fifth floor and ring the doorbell with your elbow. When the door open, push with your foot."
"Why use my elbow and foot?"
"Well, gosh," was the reply, "You're not coming empty-handed, are you?"
一个声名狼藉的小气鬼终于决定要请一次客了。他在向一个朋友解释怎么找到他家时说：“你上到五楼，用你的胳膊肘按门铃。门开了后，再用你的脚把门推开。”
“为什么我要用我的肘和脚呢?”
“天哪!” 吝啬鬼回答，“你总不会空着手来吧?”
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