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关于初中生必读英语笑话

时间: 韦彦867 分享

  民间笑话故事像神话小说等民间文学一样,是广大劳动人民在长期的生产劳动和与自然界作斗争的过程中,以口头形式创作和传承的文学体裁。本文是关于初中生必读英语笑话,希望对大家有帮助!

  关于初中生必读英语笑话:我需要器官移植

  The patient is adamant. "Doc, I need a liver transplant, a kidney transplant, a heart transplant, a cornea transplant, a spleen transplant, a pancreas trans. . ." "What makes you think you need all these?" Well, replied the patient, "My boss said if I wanted to keep my job I needed to get reorganized."

  这个病人显得很坚决。“医生,我需要做肝脏移植、肾脏移植、心脏移植、角膜移植、脾脏移植、胰腺移植和。。。” “你为什么认为你需要做这么多移植手术?”病人回答:“哦,是这样,我的老板说如果我这个人不重新组装的话,就别想保住我的工作!”

  关于初中生必读英语笑话:Chaude and Cold 热与冷

  A patron in Montreal cafe turned on a tap in the washroom and got scalded. "This is an outrage," he complained. "The faucet marked C gave me boiling water."

  "But, Monsieur, C stands for chaude - French for hot. You should know that if you live in Montreal."

  "Wait a minute," roared the patron. "The other tap is also marked C."

  "Of course," said the manager, "It stands for cold. After all, Montreal is a bilingual city."

  蒙特利尔咖啡馆的一位顾客拧开盥洗室的水龙头,结果被水烫伤了。“这太可恶了,”他抱怨道,“标着C的龙头流出的是开水。”

  “可是,先生,C代表Chaude,在法语里代表'热'。如果您住在蒙特利尔的话就应该知道这一点。”

  “等等,”那位顾客咆哮着,“另外一个龙头标的也是C。”

  “那当然,”经理说道:“这个C代表冷。毕竟,蒙特利尔是个双语城市。”

  关于初中生必读英语笑话:Free advice? 免费的建议?

  A doctor and a lawyer were talking at a party. Their conversation was constantly interrupted by people describing their ailments and asking the doctor for free medical advice. After an hour of this, the exasperated doctor asked the lawyer, "What do you do to stop people from asking you for legal advice when you're out of the office?"

  "I give it to them," replied the lawyer, "and then I send them a bill." The doctor was shocked, but agreed to give it a try. The next day, still feeling slightly guilty, the doctor prepared the bills. When he went to place them in his mailbox, he found a bill from the lawyer.

  医生和律师正在一个宴会上交谈。他们的谈话常被一些人打断,那些人向医生描述自己的病症,期望获得免费的治疗建议。如此这般一个钟头后,医生有点恼火,于是他问律师:“如果不在办公时间,你是怎么阻止人们向你咨询法律问题的?”

  “我会给他们建议,”律师回答,“然后我会给他们寄去帐单”。医生很震惊,但他还是决定这么试一试。第二天,带着点犯罪感,他准备了帐单。当他准备将它们放到邮箱里时,发现了一张来自律师的帐单。

  关于初中生必读英语笑话:新发现 New Discovery

  一个乡下人第一次到大城市游逛。他走进一座大楼,看见一个岁数很大的矮胖女人迈进一个小房间。房间的门随后关上,有几个灯在闪亮。一会儿,门开了,电梯里走出一位年青漂亮的女模特。

  乡下人惊奇地眨着眼睛,慢吞吞地说:“我应该把我的老婆带来!”

  New Discovery

  A hillbilly was visiting the big city for the first time. Entering an office building, he saw a pudgy older woman step into a small room. The doors closed, lights flashed, and after a while the door slid open and a beautiful young model stepped off the elevator.

  Blinking in amazement, the hillbilly drawled, "I should have brought my wife!"

  关于初中生必读英语笑话:其余的事由我负责

  一位车上的列车员刚发出信号让火车启动,这时他看见一位很漂亮的姑娘站在站台上一节打开的车厢门旁边,跟车厢里另一位漂亮姑娘在说话。

  “快点,小姐!”他喊道:“请把门关上。”

  “噢,我还没有和妹妹吻别呢。”她回答道。

  “请把门关上好了,”列车员说:“其余的事由我负责。”

  I'll See to the Rest

  A guard was about to signal his train to start when he saw an attractive girl standing on the platform by an open door, talking to another pretty girl inside the carriage.

  "Come on, miss!" he shouted. "Shut the door, please!"

  "Oh, I just want to kiss my sister goodbye," she called back.

  "You just shut that door, please," called the guard, "and I'll see to the rest."

  
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