爆笑英语经典笑话阅读

时间：2017-05-25 11:03:42 韦彦867由分享

　　笑话大多揭示生活中乖谬的现象,具有讽刺性和娱乐性。几乎所有笑话都包含两个要点:一是笑话开头,二是笑点。小编精心收集了爆笑英语经典笑话，供大家欣赏学习!

　　爆笑英语经典笑话篇1

　　Father: Well, Tom, I asked to your teacher today, and now I want to ask you a question. Who is the laziest person in your class?

　　Tom: I don't know, father.

　　Father: Oh, yes, you do! Think! When other boys and girls are doing and writing, who sits in the class and only watches how other people work?

　　Tom: Our teacher, father.

　　父亲：哎，汤姆，今天我跟你们老师谈过，现在我想问你个问题。你们班上谁最懒?

　　汤姆：我不知道，爸爸。

　　父亲：啊，不对，你知道!想想看，当别的孩子们都在做作业、写字时，谁在课堂上坐着，只是看人家做功课?

　　汤姆：我们老师，爸爸。

　　爆笑英语经典笑话篇2

　　An old couple went into a restaurant and ordered something to eat: one Coca Cola and one portion of French fries. The old man sat down and the woman, his wife, sat opposite him, and he began to divide the Coca Cola into two glasses, half for him and half for his wife.

　　He divided all the French fries half-and-half. He gave half to his wife and kept half for himself. Then he began to eat and drink,and the woman just drank but didn't eat.

　　There was a young man who was standing next to the table and wondering why the old man had divided everything in half, and he thought that maybe they didn't have any money. He said to the old couple, "Okay, I can buy you one more portion; you don't have to share like that."

　　So the old man explained, "No, no, no, we have been married for forty years and we always share everything. Whatever we have, we share half and half. Don't worry, but thank you, anyhow."

　　But then after a while, he saw that the woman wasn't eating eat, and only the man ate, and he asked, "Why aren't you eating?" And the wife said, "Today it's his turn to use the teeth."

　　有一对老夫妇到速食店去，叫了一罐可乐和一份薯条。然后他们面对面坐下来，那位老先生先把可乐分成两杯，一杯给他自己，另一杯给他太太。

　　接着他又将薯条分成两份，一份给他太太、一份给自己。然后他开始吃薯条、喝可乐，但是他的太太只是喝可乐，不吃薯条。

　　一个年轻人刚好站在旁边，看到老先生把每样食物都分成两半，觉得很奇怪，他想或许他们没有钱，便跟老夫妇说：‘我可以再买一份给你们，你们就不用这样分了。’

　　老先生解释说：‘不、不!我们结婚四十年了，一直都是分享每件事物，什么东西都是一个人分一半。不用担心我们，不过还是谢谢你的好意。’

　　过了一会儿，他看只有老先生吃着薯条，老太太没吃，便问老太太：‘你为什么都不吃呢?’老太太说：‘今天轮到他用牙齿。’