外国最新幽默故事三则
外国最新幽默故事三则
笑话是一种增强快乐的文化，常常以篇幅短小，故事情节简单，文笔巧妙的形式出现，给人以出乎意料，并且取得笑意的艺术效果的文化。在忙碌的生活，我们也需要偶尔的放松一下自己。下面学习啦小编为大家带来外国最新幽默故事三则，希望大家喜欢!
外国最新幽默故事：狡猾的恶棍
Joe Blow the aspiring young executive was late for an appointment and in the process of doubling the speed limit in his BMW when a VW beetle pulled out in front of him. He could not slow down fast enough and slammed into the beetle.
乔勃，这个年轻有为的总经理为了能准时赴约，以超过限速两倍的速度驾驶着他的那辆宝马车，这时前面的一辆大众甲壳虫汽车突然停了下来。因为乔勃的车速太快根本无法及时刹车，于是一下子撞到了甲壳虫的后面。
Surprisingly, the BMW was totaled while the beetle was in good shape. The driver of the compact was amused at the condition of the two cars.
更让人费解的是，只有他的宝马车被撞坏了，而那辆甲壳虫却安然无恙。那辆车的司机也为此感到很惊讶。
The executive was so enraged that he had a hard time keeping from attacking the driver of the VW. The executive drew a large circle on the ground off to one side. He said, "You get in that circle and stay there, or I’m going to beat the shit out of you!” The executive got a tire iron out of his trunk and smashed the windshield of the beetle. The man in the circle just smiled. The executive just got madder and madder. He smashed the headlights and taillights. When he looked back, the other man was snickering to himself. This so infuriated the executive that he smashed in the hood of the beetle. The other man was laughing so hard that he could barely stand up.
年轻的经理怒发冲冠，极力地压制着要揍那个司机一顿的冲动。他走下车在路边画了一个很大的圈，然后说:“你给我走到圈子里来并呆在那里，否则我要你好看!”说着他从后备箱里拿出一个轮胎铁心，然后用力将甲壳虫的挡风玻璃砸得粉碎。站在圈里的那个人只是笑了笑。乔勃快要被气疯了。他又砸碎了甲壳虫的前灯和尾灯。可当他回头看时，那一个人还在那里暗笑。他又一次被激怒了，这次他把甲壳虫的车棚也给砸了。此刻那一个人笑得都直不起腰了。
Unable to stand any more, the frustrated executive tromped away. About this time a fellow in a pick up truck pulled up and offered the VW driver a ride. "What are you laughing about? He just trashed your car.” "Well"，the other man said，" but I have gone out of that circle three times.”
乔勃再也受不了了，愤愤地离开了。这时一个拖车司机过来让那个甲壳虫司机搭便车，并问他:“刚才他在砸你的车你怎么还笑呀?”“是呀，”另一个人回答说:“可是我刚才曾经三次偷偷地溜出了圈子!”
外国最新幽默故事：拼字比赛
A student at the National Spelling Bee had been given a particularly difficult word to spell. Apparently having some trouble knowing how to start, the student asked if he could buy a vowel.
一个学生在全国拼词比赛上遇到了一个极难拼写的词。显然他是不知该从何下手了，于是这个学生便询问能不能买一个元音字母。
外国最新幽默故事：发生在院子里的怪事
A woman with a broken ankle was gingerly hobbling along on crutches as she attempted to walk her dog. Because of her handicap, however, she was having a lot oftrouble keeping the dog under control. Finally, the dog lunged forward, the leash slipped out of her hand, and the dog went running down the street. She called and called, but the dog wouldn't come back. Since she couldn’t chase after it, she eventually gave up and went home.
一个跛脚的女人手里拄着一根拐杖，跟在她的狗后面一瘸一拐地往前走。因为她的腿脚不方便所以很难控制住她的狗，这时牵着狗的链子从这个女人手中脱落了，这条狗沿着马路跑了下去。不管她喊什么，这条狗都不理睬，她也知道自己根本不可能追上，于是她也就放弃了努力，独自一人回家了。
A couple of hours later she heard something scratching at the door. When she went to the door she found her dog standing there with a dead rabbit in its mouth. Upon closer inspection, she realized it was the neighbors' pet rabbit. She knewshe would never be able to tell them what happened, and since they were out of town for the weekend，she hit upon a plan.
几个小时后她听到有什么东西在敲门的声音。打开门一看，她的那只狗正站在门外，嘴里还叼着一只死兔子。仔细一看，正是在邻居家养的那只兔子。她知道决不能让那家人知道这件事。因
为，他们都出城度周末去了，于是她想出了一个好主意。
She took the rabbit into the bathroom, washed it off, and blew its fur dry. Then she took the rabbit back to the neighbors’backyard and put the rabbit back in its cage. She thought the neighbors would discover the rabbit dead and think it died in the cage. They would never suspect what really happened.
她把死兔子放进浴缸里洗干净，用吹风机把它身上的毛吹干，然后又把它重新放回邻居后院的兔笼里。她想邻居回来以后一定会认为兔子是自己死在笼子里的，决不会想到这里发生的一切。
On Monday，there was a knock at the door, and when she answered，there was her neighbor standing there. He asked her if she had seen anyone in their backyard over the weekend. She said no. He said, "Did you see anything strange going on around our house or yard?" Again, she denied seeing anything suspicious. She said，"Why are you asking me these questions? What happened?" He said，"Well，something really strange is going on inmy backyard. On Friday our rabbit died, so we buried it in the backyard. But when we came back from the weekend，it was back in the cage !”
星期一的早上，这个女人的邻居敲开了她的房门。他问这个女人在周末有没有看到什么人去过他家的后院。女人回答说没有。“那你有没有看到什么奇怪的事情发生在房中或者院子里?”这个女人仍回答没有。然后她问:“为什么你要问我这些问题?发生什么事了?”那个邻居回答:“我家的后院出了件怪事。上周五我家的兔子死了，我们把它埋在后院里，可是当我们度完周末回到家后，却发现它又重新回到笼子里了。”