轻松生活英语笑话

轻松生活英语笑话

　　“哪里有人,哪里就有笑声。”从古到今,笑话是人们生活中不可缺少的“调剂品”。笑话使人们在刻板的生活中感到一丝快意和放松，在人们的日常生活中起着重要调剂作用。下面学习啦小编为大家带来轻松生活英语笑话，欢迎大家阅读!

　　轻松生活英语笑话：速度限制

　　The British RAF base where I was stationed as part of a contingent of USAF personnel had one narrow road winding through the crowded residential area. After a rash of minor vehicle pedestrian accidents, the USAF commander decided to reduce the speed limit to three m.p.h.

　　Shortly after the new limit was posted, an MP sergeant issued a speeding citation to a jeep driver for going five m.p.h. I was curious to know how the MP had determined the jeep's speed so exactly. "I was jogging to get to the PX before it closed," he explained, "and as I passed the jeep, I noticed that the speedometer read five m.p.h."

　　我作为美国空军人员分遣部队的一员驻扎在英国皇家空军某某地，那里有一条狭窄的马路蜿蜒穿过拥挤的居民区。因为多次出现汽车撞伤行人一类不甚严重的车祸，美国空军司令员决定将车速限制在每小时三英里。

　　新的车速限制公布后不久，一名骑警中士因一名吉普车司机开车时速达五英里而给他开了一张超速传票。

　　我很想知道骑警是怎样如此精确地知道那辆吉普车的速度的。“我遛达着要在邮局关门之前到达那里，”他解释道：“当我超过吉普车时，我注意到计速器指向了每小时五英里。

　　轻松生活英语笑话：法官与小偷

　　It was Christmas and the judge was in a benevolent mood as he questioned the prisoner. "What are you charged with?" he asked.

　　"Doing my christmas shopping early," replied the defendant.

　　"That's no offense," replied the judge, "How early were you doing this shopping?"

　　"Before the store opened," countered the prisoner.

　　那天是圣诞节，法官在审讯犯人时也有点恻隐之心。“你为什么而被起诉?”他问。

　　“采购圣诞节物品过早。”被告答。

　　“这不算犯法，”法官回答，“你购物多早?”

　　在商店开门之前，“犯人应道。

　　轻松生活英语笑话：我们只听一面之辞

　　A judge asked our group of potential jurors(陪审员) whether anyone should be excused, and one man raised his hand."I can't hear out of my left ear," the man told the judge."Can you hear out of your right ear?" the judge asked. The man nodded his head."You'll be allowed to serve on the jury," the judge declared. "We only listen to one side of the case at a time."

　　一位法官问我们这群修补陪审员是否有人应当免权，一个人举起了手。“我的左耳听不见。”那人告诉法官。“你的右边耳朵听得见吗?”法官问道，那人点了点头。“你将被允许加入陪审团，”法官宣布，“我们每次只听一面之辞。”