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简短的英语笑话

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简短的英语笑话

  笑话是一种颇受人们喜爱的民间叙事类型,材料丰富,有广泛的现实基础。小编精心收集了简短的英语笑话,供大家欣赏学习!

  简短的英语笑话:A Stubborn Horse

  The great novelist had gone mad, but now there seemed to be some hope for his recovery. For six months, he had been sitting at his typewriter pounding out a novel. Finally, he pronounced it completed and brought the book to his psychiatrist, who eagerly began reading it aloud:

  "General Jackson leaped upon his faithful horse and yelled, 'Giddyap, giddyap, giddyap, giddyap"' The doctor thumbed through the rest of the manuscript." There's nothing here but 500 pages of giddyaps! " he exclaimed."

  "Stubborn horse," explained the writer.

  倔强的马

  大作家疯了,但现在似乎还有恢复的希望。六个月以来,他都坐在打字机旁用力地敲一部小说。终于,他宣称书已写好并把它拿到精神病医生那里。医生急切地大声朗读起来:

  “杰克逊将军跨上他的忠实的马,喊道:‘驾,驾,驾,驾……’”医生翻了翻剩下的手稿。“五百页纸竟全是‘驾,驾’!”他惊奇地说。

  “是匹倔强的马,”作家解释道。

  简短的英语笑话:Looking for a companion

  A bachelor asked the computer to find him the perfect mate: ' I want a companion who is small and cute, loves water sports and enjoys group activities. "

  Back came the answer: "Marry a penguin. "

  Looking for a companion

  A bachelor asked the computer to find him the perfect mate: ' I want a companion who is small and cute, loves water sports and enjoys group activities. "

  Back came the answer: "Marry a penguin. "

  简短的英语笑话:My Roommate

  My roommate was interested in a young man in her English-literature class, but she was too shy to let him know. One day she overheard him say he was on his way to the library for a certain book. She rushed to the library, found the book and stuck in it a letter from her mother.

  "Why would he want to read a letter from your mother?" I asked.

  "He wouldn't, but if he's any kind of gentleman, he'll return it to me " Her dorm and room numbers were on the envelope, of course.

  The next day he appeared with the letter and asked my roommate out on a date. "Couldn't fail," she later told me. "The book was Great Expectations.

  简短的英语笑话:12 Post Cards

  My teen-age daughter was preparing to return home after having visited her grandparents for a few weeks one summer. Her grandfather gave her 12 post cards .

  "Here, write us a few lines every month," he said.

  Months passed and the cards remained unused-that is until the day this letter arrived:

  "Dear Jennifer,

  Life is a series of stages.

  As a child, I looked forward to becoming a teenager-that happened.

  As a teen-ager ,I looked forward to becoming a young man-that happened.

  As a young man, I looked forward to meeting a young woman, in love and becoming a married man-that happened.

  As a married man, I looked forward to becoming a father-that happened.

  As a father, I looked forward to becoming a grandfather to beautiful ,intelligent grandchildren-that happened.

  Then I looked forward to the day they would learn to write-that hasn't happened yet.

  十二张卡片

  一个夏天,我十多岁的女儿在她祖父母家过了几周。她准备回家时,祖父给了她十二张卡片。

  “每月给我们来个短信,”他说。

  几个月过去了,可卡片一直放在那儿没用----直到有一天来了这样一封信:

  “亲爱的詹妮芙:

  生活是一系列阶段组成的。

  还是个孩子的时候,我期待着成为一个青少年----我如愿以偿了。

  还是个年轻人的时候,我期待着遇到一个年轻的女人,恋爱、结婚----我如愿以偿了。

  结了婚,我便期待着成为一个父亲----我如愿以偿了。

  作为父亲,我期待着成为一个祖父,有漂亮、聪明的孙儿孙女----我也如愿以偿了。

  接着,我期待着有一天他们能给我写信----我却还没有如愿以偿。

  简短的英语笑话:Get a Job

  One day shortly after I had come home from college, my father was outside doing yard work. He found a baby bird under a tree and assumed it had fallen from its nest. Wanting to return the tiny creature to its home, my dad went to get a ladder . When he got back, he found another baby bird on the ground.

  Suddenly he heard a loud chirping from above. Looking up, my father saw the mother bird giving a third baby the boot from its nest. With that, Dad walked into our house, took one look at me watching television and barked, "Get a job!"

  找个工作

  一天,我刚刚从学院回到家里,我父亲正在院子里面做活。他发现树下有一个雏鸟,猜想可能是从窝里掉下来的。父亲便去搬梯子,他想把这个小东西送回它的家。梯子搬来了,可父亲发现地上又多了一个雏鸟。

  突然他听到树上有大声的唧唧声。父亲抬起头,看见母鸟正在把第三只雏鸟往巢外踢。

  看到这些,父亲走进屋,看了一眼在看电视的我,大声叫道:“找个工作去!”

  
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