学习啦【英语笑话】 编辑：韦彦 发布时间：2016-09-14
蜗牛的故事 The Story of a Snail
When a snail crossed the road, he was run over by a turtle. Regaining consciousness in theemergency room, he was asked what caused the accident.
"I really can't remember," the snail replied. "You see, it all happened so fast."
A Call From A Frog
A frog telephones the Psychic Hotline and is told, "You are going to meet a beautiful young girl who will want to know everything about you . "
The frog says, "This is great! Will I meet her at a party, or what?"
"No," says the psychic. "Next semester in her biology class.
The Shepherd and the Bureaucrat
A bureaucrat was hiking when he came upon a shepherd tending a large flock. The bureaucrat took a fancy to the sheep and asked the shepherd, "If I can guess how many there are, may I have one?" The shepherd thought it unlikely the man would guess the exact number, so he agreed.
The bureaucrat guessed, "You have 287 sheep." The shepherd was astonished, since this was exactly right.
"Can I pick out my sheep now?" asked the bureaucrat. The shepherd grudgingly gave his permission. Selecting one, the bureaucrat slung it over his shoulders to carry home.
The shepherd got an idea." If I guess your occupation'," he said, "may I have my sheep back?" The bureaucrat was surprised, but figured there was little chance of the shepherd guessing correctly, so he went along. "You're a bureaucrat, "announced the shepherd. Amazed, the bureaucrat asked.
"How did you know?"
The shepherd replied, "Put the dog down and we'll talk about it.
Although I had never met him, I knew that my grandfather had been five feet, six inches tall,while my stately grandmother stood five feet, eleven inches. As a teen-ager leafing through oldphotographs with Grandma, I finally realized how unusual they must have looked together.
"Grandma, " I asked, "how could you have fallen in love with a man five inches shorter thanyou?"
She turned to me. "Honey," she said, "we fell in love sitting down, and when I stood up, itwas too late."