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中学英语笑话短文阅读

学习啦【英语笑话】 编辑:韦彦 发布时间:2016-09-29

  与一般日常会话不同,笑话刻意地违反合作原则,引导出会话含意,并且利用会话含意之间的冲突来达到其预定功能。下面是学习啦小编带来的中学英语笑话短文阅读,欢迎阅读!

  中学英语笑话短文阅读篇一

  keep driving my truck 继续开我的卡车

  With several years of Army National Guard duty under his belt,

  依仗着在陆军国家护卫队服役的几年经验,

  my roommate applied for officer training.

  我的室友提交了参加军官培训的申请。

  But his lifelong dreams were dashed after he failed the eye exam.

  但他的毕生梦想在体检未通过后破灭

  "That's too bad," I sympathized.

  “太糟了”,我同情地说。“

  "Does that mean you now have to quit the Guard entirely?"

  “这是不是意味着你完全不能再在护卫队工作了?”

  "No, I get to keep my old job," he said. "Driving trucks."

  “这倒不是,我还是干我的原来的工作”,他说。“开卡车”。

  中学英语笑话短文阅读篇二

  Bargain 讨价还价

  My son, a used-car dealer,

  我儿子是个二手汽车商。

  showed his customer a 2005 Chevy in great condition.

  一次,他给一位顾客展示一辆车况还很不错的2005年雪弗莱。

  "And it's only $7, 000," he told the man.

  “这辆车只要7000美元”,他跟顾客说。

  "I'm willing to give you $3, 500," said the customer.

  “我只想给3500美元”,顾客说。

  My son feigned disappointment.

  我儿子装着很失望地回答说

  "If at all possible," he responded, "I'd like to sell you the whole car."

  “如果真的有可能,我原意整辆卖给你”。

  中学英语笑话短文阅读篇三

  Leave the color 把颜色留下

  Years ago, people rented phones from the local telephone company

  几年前,人们从当地的电话公司租用电话时

  and had the option of paying a one-time fee to have a color model.

  只要选择额外一次性地付一点钱就能拿到一个彩色的电话机。

  One customer, who had had his phone for some time,

  有一名顾客在电话用了一些日子后忘记了这个规则。

  forgot how this worked.

  当我去中断他的电话服务时,

  When I was disconnecting his service,

  他不让我把电话机带走。

  he objected to my leaving with his phone.

  “那是我的电话机”,他生气地说

  "That's mine," he said angrily. "I paid for it."

  “我付了钱的。”

  "No, sir, you paid for the color, not the phone," I explained.

  不是,先生,你付的是颜色的钱,不是手机。我给他解释。

  "Okay, take the phone," he said calmly, "but leave the color."

  “那好,把电话拿走吧,”他平静地说,“但颜色得留。

  中学英语笑话短文阅读篇四

  Blonde Detectives 美女侦探

  A policeman was interrogating 3 blondes who were training to become detectives.

  一位警官正在询问三位想成为侦探的金发女郎。

  To test their skills in recognizing a suspect,

  为了测试她们辨别嫌疑犯的技巧,

  he shows the first blonde a picture for 5 seconds and then hides it.

  他让其中一位看一张照片,五秒钟后把照片藏了起来。

  "This is your suspect, how would you recognize him?"

  “这就是你的嫌疑犯,你怎么样能把他再认出来?”

  The first blonde answers,这位美女回答,

  "That's easy, we'll catch him fast because he only has one eye!"

  “这太容易了,他只有一只眼睛,我一下就能认出他来!”

  The policeman says,

  警官说,

  "Well...uh...that's because the picture shows his profile."

  “喔……嗯……那是因为这只是他的侧面。”

  Slightly flustered by this ridiculous response,

  警官被这个荒谬的答案搞的有点不知所措,

  he flashes the picture for 5 seconds at the second blonde and asks her,

  他把照片在第二位小姐面前一晃,五秒钟后问道,

  "This is your suspect, how would you recognize him?"

  “这就是你的嫌疑犯,你怎样才能把他认出来?”

  The second blonde giggles, flips her hair and says,

  女郎咯咯地傻笑,撩了撩自己的头发说,

  "Ha! He'd be too easy to catch because he has only one ear!"

  “哈!他太容易被认出来了,因为他只有一只耳朵!”

  The policeman angrily responds,

  警官恼怒地叫起来,

  "What's the matter with you two?

  你们两个是怎么搞的?

  Of course only one eye and one ear are showing because it's a picture of his profile!

  他当然只有一只眼睛一只耳朵,因为这是他的侧面像!

  Is that the best answer you can come up with?"这就是你们最好的答案吗?”

  Extremely frustrated at this point,he shows the picture to the third blonde

  他很泄气地给第三位女郎看了照片,

  and in a very testy voice asks,

  很不耐烦地问她

  "This is your suspect, how would you recognize him?",

  “这是你的嫌疑犯,你怎么样再认出他来?”

  He quickly adds "... think hard before giving me a stupid answer."

  他迅速又补充了一句,“在给我愚蠢的答案之前你先好好想想。”

  The blonde looks at the picture intently for a moment and says,

  这位美女很专心地看了一会儿,

  "Hmmmm... the suspect wears contact lenses."

  说,“他戴的是隐形眼镜。”

  The policeman is surprised and speechless because he really doesn't know himself if the suspect wears contacts or not.

  警官非常吃惊,一句话也说不出来了因为连他自己都不知道那个人是不是戴隐形眼镜。

  "Well, that's an interesting answer...“

  嗯,这个答案真有意思。

  wait here for a few minutes while I check his file and I'll get back to you on that.

  "你稍等,我去查一下他的档案,马上回来。”

  He leaves the room and goes to his office,

  他离开屋子回到办公室,

  checks the suspect's file in his computer,

  查了下电脑中的档案

  and comes back with a beaming smile on his face.,

  喜气洋洋地回来了。

  "Wow! I can't believe it... it's TRUE!

  “哇!我简直不能相信。是真的!

  The suspect does in fact wear contact lenses.

  他确实是戴隐形眼镜的。你做得太棒了!你怎么会有这么敏锐的观察力呢?”

  Good work! How were you able to make such an astute observation?"

  “很简单啊,”女郎回答说,

  "That's easy," the blonde replied. "He can't wear regular glasses because he only has one eye and one ear."

  “他不可能带普通眼镜的嘛,因为他只有一只眼睛和一只耳朵。”

  
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