学习啦【英语笑话】 编辑：韦彦 发布时间：2016-09-30 19:37:13
The assistant curator of the museum came to the head curator with a couple of problems.”Sir, the mummy is damp and getting moldy, and the white mouse in the maze exhibit has developed dry skin.”
The head, curator thought a minute，then advised, "Put your mummy where your mouse is.”
Three famous surgeons were bragging about their skills. "A man came to me who had his hand cut off，“said one. "Today that man is a concert violinist."
That's nothing." said another.“A guy came to me who had his legs cut off. I stitched them back on，and today that man is a marathon runner."
"I can top both of you，"said the third. "One day I came on the scene of a terrible accident. ,There was nothing left but a horse's posterior---and a pair of glasses. Today that man is seated in the United States Senate. "
My mother and a group of her friends were discussing housecleaning. Mom, who dislikes the task，stated in a matter-of-fact way,”Oh，I'm giving it up. I'm going to let the dirt build up. Then I'll call the police， report a burglary, and let them come and dust for fingerprints.”
I wanted to look especially nice when I valked my son to his first day of kindergarten，so I took the liberty of borrowing an outfit from my younger，more fashionable sister，who was staying with us at the time. We had agreed not to borrow from one another without asking，but she was asleep，so I slipped some shorts and a shirt out of her drawer silently，planning to put them back before she woke up.
To my surprise .she was awake when I got back, but she didn't mention the clothes. We chatted about Jason's introduction to kindergarten. Finally，she smiled and asked coolly，"And how did Jason's teacher like my pajamas?"
It was sunny and warm when our neighbor, Danny，left home for his first day of school. He was the proud if reluctaut possessor of a new sport coat and tie，since his school had a dress requirement.
At dismissal time，it was hot out. I could see Danny's mom watching from her front door to catch a glimpse of her handsome young man getting off the school bus. Finally，he appeared- tie undone，lunch box in hand，no coat in sight.
His mother yelled，"Danny，where's your jacket?"
“It's okay，Mom，"he hollered. "It's in my lunch box.”