英语爆笑笑话8篇

　　下面是学习啦小编整理的英语爆笑笑话，希望对大家有帮助。

　　英语爆笑笑话：

　　A fourth-grade teacher was giving her pupils a lesson on logic.

　　Here is the situation, she said. A man is standing up in a boat in the middle of a river, fishing. He loses his balance, falls in, and begins splashing and yelling for help.

　　His wife hears the commotion, knows that he can't swim, and runs down to the bank. Why do you think she ran to the bank?

　　A girl raised her hand and asked, to draw out all of his savings?

　　小学四年级的教师正在给学生们上一堂逻辑课。她举了这么一个例子：有这样一种情况，一个男人在河中心的船上钓鱼，突然失去重心掉进了水里。于是他开始挣扎并喊救命。

　　他的妻子听到了他的喊声，知道他并不会游泳，所以她就急忙跑向河岸。谁能告诉我这是为什么? 一个女生举手答道，是不是去取他的存款?

　　英语爆笑笑话：

　　Our son, at age of five, had a fascination for motorcycles. The sight of one would always bring forth squeals(长声尖叫) of delight, accompanied by excited remarks of Look at that! Look at that! I'm going to have one of those someday, his dad's response always was Not as long as I'm alive.

　　One day, while our son was talking to a little friend, a motorcycle passed by. He excitedly pointed it out to the boy and exclaimed, Look at that! Look at that! I'm getting one of those as soon as my dad dies.

　　我五岁的儿子对摩托车有强烈的爱好。只要看见一辆摩托车，他就会高兴得哇哇直叫，并激动地说：瞧这辆!瞧这辆，我总有一天也要有一辆。他爸爸的回答老是只要我活着，你就别想有这玩艺儿。

　　一天我们的儿子跟他的小朋友在说话，有一辆摩托车开了过去。他兴奋的指着摩托车叫道瞧这辆!瞧这辆!等我爸一死我就要有这样一辆摩托车了。

　　英语爆笑笑话：

　　Once in a physics examination, Nick finished the first question very soon, while his classmates were thinking it hard.

　　The question was: When it thunders why do we see the lighting first, then hear the thunderrolls?

　　Nick's answer: Because our eyes are before ears.

　　在一次物理考试时，当同学们都还在苦思冥想时，尼克很快就答好了第一个问题。

　　这个问题是：为什么在打雷时，我们总是先看到闪电后听到雷声?

　　尼克的回答是：因为眼睛在前，耳朵在后。

　　英语爆笑笑话：

　　It's His Fault

　　Billy and Bobby were small boys. They were brothers, and they often had fights with each other.

　　Last Saturday their mother said to them, I'm going to cook our lunch now. Go out and play in the garden and be good.

　　Yes, Mummy, the two boys answered, and they went out.

　　They played in the garden for half an hour, and then Billy ran into the kitchen. Mummy, he said, Bobby's broken a window in Mrs. Allen's house. Mrs. Allen was one of their neighbors.

　　He's a bad boy, his mother said. How did he break it?

　　I threw a stone at him, Billy answered, and he quickly moved down.

　　是他的错

　　比利和波比都是小男孩。他们是兄弟，两人经常打架。

　　上个星期六，他们的妈妈对他们说，我现在要做午饭了。去，到花园去玩吧，别淘气。

　　是，妈妈，两个男孩回答，然后他们就出去了。

　　他们在花园里玩了半个小时，然后比利跑进了厨房。妈妈，他说，波比打碎了艾伦太太家的窗玻璃。艾伦太太是他们的邻居。

　　他是个坏孩子，他的妈妈说，他是怎么把玻璃打碎的?

　　我朝他扔了一块石子，比利回答道，他赶紧蹲下。

　　英语爆笑笑话：

　　He Won

　　Tommy: How is your little brother, Johnny? Johnny: He is ill in bed. He hurt himself.

　　Tommy: That's too bad. How did that happen?

　　Johnny: We played who could lean furthest out of the window, and he won.

　　他赢了

　　汤姆：约翰尼，你小弟弟好吗?

　　约翰尼：他害病卧床了。他受了伤。

　　汤姆：真糟糕，怎么回事儿?

　　约翰尼：我们做游戏，看谁能把身子探出窗外最远，他赢了。

　　英语爆笑笑话：

　　He's just Been to the Zoo

　　When I was waitting in line at the bank , I noticed a woman holding a small child at one of thewindows. The boy was eating a roll ,which he thrust at the teller. The teller smiled and shook his head.

　　"No, no, dear," said the boy's mom. and then , turnning to the teller , "I beg your pardon , young man. Please forgive my son . He's just been to the zoo."

　　他刚去过动物园

　　当我在银行里排队时，发现一位妇女抱着一个小孩站在一个窗口。男孩正在吃一个面包卷，并将面包卷戳向出纳员，出纳员笑着摇了摇头。

　　“别这样，亲爱的，” 男孩的妈妈说。然后她转向出纳员说，“对不起，小伙子。请原谅我的儿子，他刚去过动物园。”

　　英语爆笑笑话：Whats time to a pig?

　　One day a visitor from the city came to a small rural area to drive around the country roads, see how the farms looked, and perhaps to see how farmers earned their living. The city man saw a farmer in his yard, holding a pig up in his hands, and lifting it so that the pig could eat apples from an apple tree. The city man said to the farmer," I see that your pig likes apples, but isn"t that quite a waste of time?" The farmer replied," What"s time to a pig?"

　　一天，有一个城市里的游客来到一个小乡村，在乡间路上开着车，想看看农庄是什么样子，也想看看农夫怎样种田过日子。这位城里人看见一位农夫在宅后的草地 上，手中抱着一头猪，并把它举得高高的，好让它能够吃到树上的苹果。城里人对农夫说，"我看你的猪挺喜欢吃苹果的，但是，这不是很浪费时间吗?"那位农夫 回答说，“时间对猪有什么意义?”

　　英语爆笑笑话：我和老师的故事

　　Teacher: Tom and John! Why are you late for school today?

　　老师：汤姆!约翰!你俩今天为什么迟到了!

　　Tom: Madam, I lost a one-dollar coin and was searching for it.

　　汤姆：老师，我一直在找我丢失的一美元硬币。

　　Teachear: John, what about you?

　　老师：那么你呢，约翰?

　　John: Madam, I was not able to move beacause I was hiding that coin under my feet.

　　约翰：老师，我不能动啊，我把他的硬币藏脚底下了。