经典搞笑英语笑话 双语

　　学习英语可以是一个枯燥的过程，也可以是一个有趣的过程。小编在此献上搞笑的英语笑话，希望对大家有所帮助。

　　英语幽默小笑话：大生意

　　A young businessman had just started his business, and rented a beautiful office. Sitting there, he saw a man come into the outer office. Wishing to appear busy, the businessman picked up the phone and pretended that he had a big deal of working. He threw huge figures around and made giant commitments.

　　一个年轻人刚刚开始做生意，租了一间漂亮的办公室。他坐在那里，看见一个人从外面走进办公室。为了显得很忙碌，商人拿起电话，假装正在谈一笔大生意，还不停地甩出几个大数字，谈着大笔的买卖。

　　Finally, he hung up and asked the visitor. "Can I help you?" The man said, "Sure. I've come to install the phone”

　　最后，他挂上电话，问来访者，“能为您效劳吗?”那人说，“是的。我是来装电话的。”

　　英语幽默小笑话：请假

　　Two factory workers are talking.

　　工厂的两名工人正在谈论。

　　Woman: I can make the boss give me the day off.

　　女人:我可以让老板放我一天假。

　　Man: And how would you do that?

　　男人:你会怎么做?

　　Woman: Just wait and see.

　　女人:你就等着看吧。

　　She then hangs upside down from the ceiling. After a while, the boss comes in.

　　然后她把自己倒吊在天花板土，过了一会儿，老板走来进来。

　　Boss: What are you doing?

　　老板:你干什么呢?

　　Woman: I'm a light bulb.

　　女人:我是一个灯泡。

　　Boss: You've been working so much that you've gone crazy. I think you need to take the day off.

　　老板:你工作太多了，都发疯了。我认为你需要休息一天。

　　The man starts to follow her.

　　男人开始跟着她往外走。

　　Boss: Where are you going?

　　老板:你要去哪里?

　　Man: I'm going home, too. I can't work in the dark.

　　男人:我也要回家。我无法在黑暗中工作呀。

　　英语幽默小笑话：晚饭后我从不工作

　　A penny-pinching farmer didn't want his hired hand to stop working. One morning,he told the farmhand, "It's such a nuisance to come in from the field, wash up for lunch and take time to eat. Why don't we save time and eat lunch now?"

　　一位农场主非常吝啬，不想让他雇佣的帮手停下来休息。一天旱上，他对帮手说:“从地里回来，又要洗手吃饭，又花时间，真是太不方便了。我们何不省点时间，现在就吃午饭呢?”

　　The hired man agreed. The farm's wife brought in some cold meat and tried potatoes,and the two men ate again.

　　雇员同意了。农场主的妻子端进来一些冷肉和炸土豆。于是，两个人又开始吃起来。

　　When they had finished, the cheap farmer said, "While we're still at the table, let's have supper too." They were now served steak, boiled potatoes and mixed vegetables, and they ate once more.

　　吃完后，吝高鬼说:“既然我们还在桌子边，那我们连晚饭也吃了吧。”这次上桌的有排骨、煮土豆和杂烩青菜。于是两个人又吃起来。

　　"Now that the meals are done," the farmer announced, we can go out and work all day without interruption."

　　“现在三顿饭都吃过了，”农场主宣称道，“我们便可以出去一整天不停地干活了。”

　　"Oh. no," the farmhand answered. "I never work after supper."

　　“哦，不，”那帮手回答说，“晚饭后我从工作。”