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幽默英语笑话_爆笑笑话大全

学习啦【英语笑话】 编辑:韦彦 发布时间:2016-09-30

  笑话是日常生活中人们消遣娱乐的一种常见语言现象,其目的在于在会话过程中传递和激发幽默感。下面是学习啦小编带来的爆笑幽默笑话大全,欢迎阅读!

  爆笑幽默笑话大全篇一

  花的语言

  A gentleman entered a busy florist shop that displayed a large sign that read "Say It With Flowers".

  一位先生走进一家生意兴隆的商店。他见到花店的大广告牌上写着:“让鲜花代替您的语言。”

  "Wrap up one rose,"he told the florist.

  “请包一支玫瑰。”他对卖花的人说。

  "Only one?"the florist asked.

  “就要一支?”卖花人问。

  " Just one,“the customer replied.“I'm a man of few words. "

  “对,就一支。”那位先生说:“我这个人讲话不多。”

  爆笑幽默笑话大全篇二

  治愈的人

  "We rarely use the word cure,"said the psychiatrist to his patient. "But after five years of therapy it is my pleasure to pronounce you completely cured. "To his surprise,an unhappy look came over the woman's face. "What's wrong?"he asked.”I thought you`d be thrilled."

  “我们很少用‘治愈’这个词。”心理医生对他的患者说:“但经过五年的治疗,我十分高兴地宣布你已彻底治愈了。”出乎他的意料,这位妇女的脸上露出了不高兴的神色。“您怎么了?”医生问,“我以为您会喜出望外的。”

  " Oh,it's fine for you,"she said,”but try to look at it from my point of view. Three years ago I was Joan of Arc.Now I'm nobody.”

  “对于您来说,这当然是许好事。您应该替我想一想,三年前我还是圣女贞德。而现在我变成了普通人。”

  爆笑幽默笑话大全篇三

  烹饪节目

  Two neighbors were chatting over the back fence. "Did you know that my wife has started a cooking show on television?"one asked.

  两个邻居在后院隔着栅聊柳天。一个问:“你知道我妻子在电视上开始主持烹饪节目了吗?”

  " Really?" replied the other fellow.”That's terrific!What's the show called?"

  “真的吗?”另一个说,“那可太棒了,那个节目叫什么名字?”

  "That's Inedible. "

  “不能食用的东西。”

  爆笑幽默笑话大全篇四

  那又怎么样?

  "With a single stroke of a brush,"said the art teacher,taking his class around the National Gallery," Joshua Reynolds could change a smiling face to a frowning one. "

  “只需挥一下笔刷,”美术老师站在国家美术馆前对他的学生说,“宙华理诺思就能把一张微笑的脸变成一幅长满皱纹的脸。”

  " That's nothing,“said one small boy.”So can my mother."

  一名男生说:“那有什么,我妈妈也能做得到。”

  爆笑幽默笑话大全篇五

  上帝与恶魔

  A preacher was asking for contributions to the church's sprogram to buy food for the needy. The town gambler, who also owned the salon and several other shady operations,offered the preacher $500.“You can't take that," a scandalized deacon told the preacher. "That's the devil's money.”

  教堂活动中有个项目是为穷人捐钱买食物。一次一位牧师在请求公众捐资时,镇上一名拥有一个沙龙和几个赌场的赌场老板捐了五百块钱。“你不该接受他的钱。”一位名声很

  坏的收师对那位牧师说,“那钱是魔鬼的钱。

  "Well,brother,"said the preacher,cheerfully accepting the gift,"in that case,the devil has had his hands on it long enough. Now let's see what the Lord can do with it.”

  “澳,我说兄弟,”高兴地收了捐赠的牧师说:“要是那样的话,魔鬼的手印一定还在这钱上,现在咱们就看看上帝会怎样来对什它吧!”

  
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