学习啦【英语笑话】 编辑：韦彦 发布时间：2016-09-29
Trouble with Propositions 介词问题
A new student was just finding his way around Harvard University.
“Excuse me,” he asked an upperclassman, “can you tell me where the library’ s at?”
“What appalling diction,” sneered the older student. “I can’t imagine how you could have been admitted to Harvard. Don’t you know better than to end a sentence with a preposition.”
“O. K. Can you tell me where the library’s at, asshole?”
an uncommon cold 一次特别的伤风感冒
on a rainy, miserable day, the funeral procession was climbing the steep hill to the cemetery, when suddenly the rear door of the hearse broke open and the coffin slid out.
to the horror of the mourners, the casket hurtled down the hill, scattering motorists and pedestrians. at tremendous speed it leaped onto the sidewalk and barreled into a drugstore. it crashed into the counter and the lid flew open.
“for heaven’s sake,” said the corpse to the astonished pharmacist, “give me something to stop this coffin.”
I Didn’t Take That In 我没有把药吃下去
A fellow who was rather slow on the uptake had been suffering from constipation, so the doctor provided him with some suppositories.
A week later, the patient came back to tell the doctor that his condition had not improved.
“I’m amazed,” said the doctor. “Have you been taking the medicine I prescribed for you?”
“What do you think I ‘ve been doing, shoving it up my ass?”
You Said What? 你说什么?
Moe, Larry and Curly had been stranded on a desert island. They were walking along disconsolately when Moe happened to kick bottle lying in the sand. The bottle broke and a genie suddenly emerged before them.
“Thank you, oh Masters, for releasing me from my captivity. For your kindness,please allow me to grant you each a wish.”
“Well, it’s not too difficult to figure out what I want,” said Moe. “I wish I were back home.”
No sooner had he said the words than he was back in dear old Brooklyn.
“I want to be back home, too,” said Larry, and he, too, was instantly transported.
“Gee, it’s lonesome here without Moe and Larry,” said Curly. “I wish they were here to keep me company.”
Oh, Good Job 喔，你做得真好!
Moe, Larry, and Curly were wandering in the Arabian desert when they were captured by a band of ferocious Bedouin. “By the mode of the desert you miserable infidels must be destroyed,” declared their savage leader. “Set up the guillotine!”
Moe was the first to be ordered to the death instrument. The blade descended but, amazingly, stopped just short of his neck.
Next, Larry placed his head under the huge, razor-sharp blade. But once again it stopped short of his neck.
“By Allah, another miracle!” affirmed the sheik once more. “Release him!”
Finally, Curly was led to the ominous device. Looking closely he noticed a splinter of wood blocking the path of the blade.
“Well, no wonder it’s not working,” he announced. “Here’s your problem right here...”